The winds of change are blowing like a tornado in the plain states.

The secret time machine

Do you know we all have our own secret time machines? No, really we do! You can actually use your nose to travel back in time. Ever get a whiff of some sweet smelling smells that whisk you off to the good old days? Ever had the musty stale smell of a newspaper remind you of Sunday mornings reading the paper with Dad? Every walk by a bakery and the delicious odor emanating from the slightly cracked door brings you back to that "He-Man" cake at your eight birthday party? The one with the puppet show and the skiddish pony that hated to be ridden? Does the crisp fresh smell of newly fallen rain suck you back to that camping trip that turned out to be a nightmare because of that nasty case of poison ivy? We've all experienced this but rarely mention it to anybody. We're usually too busy to pay much attention to these subtle walks down memory lane. But, I urge you to stop the next time a familiar smell sucks you into the past. Stop, inhale deeply and enjoy your secret little time machine.
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The only thing worse then a baby with a really bad rash is a rash of really bad babies!

Every wonder why we are the way we are? Most people think it has to do with our parents. Me, I blame peeing in the pool!

During times of excrutiating boredom all I want to do is dance to Hammertime!

over the rainbow it's all greek to me.....

What a difference a few miles makes. I recently realized that our "small" world sure is big. Living in California I interact with all types of folks from all over the world. The thing is that they live in my local area and even the most traditional of cultures will adapt to the city or town around them over time. They don't seem strange or foreign to me. They are just part of my familiar life. But, what about those folks that come here to make a new life. How do they feel? To really experience how varied our world is you have to go outside of our borders. In one minute you can be in San Diego and the next your in "TJ." Just a matter of a few yards but, boy, what a difference. Every time I've ever been to Mexico I get that nervous flutterby feeling. I know I'm only 500 yards from US soil but I can't shake the feeling. I'm not afraid of the people or the culture. I'm bothered by the lack of familiarity. I'm frightened by what I don't understand. It's like having cultural vertigo. I get it now. Imagine being hundreds or thousands of miles from your familiar surroundings. I understand what people must think when they come to the US looking for streets paved with gold and all they see are streets paved with our homeless. It must be 110x as shocking as walking through TJ. In my case, I know that I have the option to turn around and walk a few yards back home. But, when people from other countries spend their life savings or even risk their lives to come here there is no turning back. They must feel like Dorothy and her house sucked up and spit out in some crazy place. They have to deal with that cultural vertigo feeling too. It all makes sense to me now. If they could click their heels together three times and wish to go home, they probably would. No wonder they look at us funny when we tell them to go back to their own country. That's exactly what they want to do. Afterall there really is no place like home.

the pinata...

Just shut up! Who do you think your talking too? I'm not here to be your punching bag. I'm not here to feed your malnourished ego. I don't care you you are. I don't really care who you think is at fault. I know it's not mine but you insist that it is. You expect me to help you? You have some nerve, buddy. You tell me that it's my job? You talk to me about customer service? you wouldn't know customer service if it hit you square in your sun-dried face. Ever thought of maybe listening to the garbage spewing out of your fat head like a sewage drain in the rainy season? Why do you think yelling will get you any further then you already are? I'm surprised that your Krispy Kreme engorged behind found the time to put down the rocky road and waddle your way in here. Every heard of killing them with kindness? If you had just one shred of smarts you would just zip it. If I'm your only hope why turn me against you? If they told you to see me, why beat me down like some cheap birthday pinata? You keep it up and I will crack just like any good pinata but there will be nothing sweet coming out of me. I promise you that. So let's start over.....what was it I could help you with today?